One Oprah “Aha!” Moment

Last night, even though I have busted my eyes all day working in front of the computer, I found myself struggling to sleep. I had one of my dormant insomnia conditions. When I mean dormant, it tells of those times when I suddenly caught myself thinking clear of things, things that I never come to my mind or have come to my mind but seem to have forgotten.

I remember, during those periods when I was living on Oprah re-runs, she said that when a woman gives up on a relationship that does not necessarily mean that she put a period on the newly acquired single status. It only means that she gave up…TRYING. You see, in a relationship, it is mostly the woman who is the nurturing party. While we see muscles on our men, it is actually us women who are taking care of them and not the other way around. Even in marriage, the women are ones who are responsible in making it work. With that, in all marriages that had reached their 10th, 20th, and Nth anniversary, a statue must be erected to honor the handiwork of the wives. Relationships simply work that way. Relationships in every inch depend on how long a woman can bear.

In every culture, a cheating husband could be more acceptable than a cheating wife. A cheating boyfriend is way cool-er than a cheating girlfriend. A cheating boyfriend will be tagged by his friend, “the Man’, while cheating girlfriends are tagged as “The Whore”. While it is easy to forgive a cheating husband, why is it that a cheating wife or girl friend be put on the same level of virtue? I am not pro-cheating…but CHEATING happens.

Cheating is not just about another man or woman interfering with a seemingly solid and beautiful relationship. Cheating is defined as betraying the very foundation of a relationship. More than bondage, loyalty, love, commitment… it is the act of sharing life…sharing each day growing together, learning about the world..TOGETHER…that is worth more than a women or a man to destroy. This is what men don’t understand. When they cheat on their woman, it is actually not the unfaithful act that pisses off their woman…it is the betrayal of the reasons, things, philosophies and everything that brought them together to be in a relationship, to live a life together, to live as one, which he chose to be just a worth “WHILE”.

What truly hurts women in a relationship is the realization that everything she worked damn hard to keep the relationship, everything that she sacrificed to hang on, every part of her life that was sacrificed and all the remainder of her life doing foolish things to keep her man entertained, satisfied and love her was simply thrown away WITHOUT REAL APPRECIATION OF THE TROUBLE SHE HAS TAKEN…WITH NO THOUGH OF HOW SHE MAY BE OF THINGS, WITHOUT SEEING THROUGH HER...AND NOT JUST THINK OF HIMSELF…I thought I knew enough about love…it seems I knew nothing at all…surely, everyone has issues but what’s the point of a relationship when there’s already no bondage, no sharing and no assurance, no nothing…life would be hell for some woman who is put in that position...